The thing with mother and newborn bonding …

What do you usually do to help when a friend or family member just had a baby?

Help her hold her baby?  Well, yes and mostly NO.

This is not supposed to be mean but well heck it’s gonna come across as is.  Most people think they are ‘helping’ when they hold the newborn for the mother.  This is mainly for their benefit … oh look I’m cuddling this cute baby!  One of the worst things you could do for her is this.

You really wanna help her?  Help her around the house, give her a hand with the shopping, cooking, cleaning etc occasionally look after the baby while she has a shower or have a break or go to the toilet … Now, that’s helping.  The initial days and weeks of bonding between the mother and her newborn is very important.  If you wanna help, give her all the time in the world to cuddle her newborn and bond with him/her.  Once this time is gone, it’s gone forever.  You don’t have to deal with the repercussions of the lack of bonding between her and her newborn – SHE does.  And it can have devastating effects.

So next time you feel like wanting to help a new mother or a mother who’s just given birth.  Let her bond with her newborn.  Her, not you.

 

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